an angle named pooja came 2 my life

as we started takin... n as we became good friends... as i came 2 know her more... i found her more n more beautiful.

how she looks? she has de cutest face with a cuter smile. i fell in love with her small beautiful face, i fell in love with her small baby like hands, i fell in love with her so curly hair... which eneryone made fun of. she was not like any person i had met b4... she was different.

An angle had come into my life, she hah some supernatural powers. she gave a meaning 2 my useless life.
no friend had ever cared 4 me like she did... none had made me feel so special... she was making me fall in love with her. she became de most beautiful person 4 me...

there were times when i used 2 get sad or angry with her and i wud decide "i will not talk 2 her"... but when she came infront of me with her magical cute smiling face... i wud 4get everythin, all my anger n sadness vanished... i wud wish that moment 2 last 4ever

if there is somethin called love this has to be it.... but due to my shy fuckin nature.... i just couldnt express my feelings.

and it began...

i still couldht believe where i had landed... "i am a computer geek, what am i doin in electronix engg." but "jo bhi hota hai aache ke liye hota hai" n really it does.

it was my first day in de college... i scaned my class... i was up set as there were only a few attractive girls..ha. there was one girl kavita she was perfect... i tried 2 befriend her but no use... i m good at nothing. Thers was a chubby, sweet girl swapna... we became good friends, she also had a nice biyfriend who seemed 2 be jelous of me.

BUT in our class i also had noticed a girl... a lonely decent lookin girl... with lots of attitude... de thing as i was never attracted 2 her. but as my destiny had it, we came 2 know each other by a coincidence... we both had 2 submit some certificate in the univercity, can u believe it only we outta de entire class.

a big step(or mistake) of my life

when it came 2 the most imp. stage of my life,engineering, i wanted de best but due 2 my ignorance i didnt try for IIT. from de day i was born i wac in love with computers so it was impossible i cud think of anything xcept comp. engg. but god had somethin else stored 4 me. due 2 my luck(which favored me 4 de 1st time) i got electronix engg. into one of de best engg. colleges in mumbai... yes mumbai. n hence started my what i can call my second phase of life, with a new ankush trin 2 improve himself. 1st time in life i wanted 2 do somethin, somethin that not everyone does. actually now i was free from de bonds of my family... n i was on top of this world

my highway

Starting from where i remember... life has always given me painful shocks, n de greatest shock came when i was only 2 yrs old... n i belive it changed me... it killed de joyfull, bubbly, always laughing, playful ankush, it made me DEAD. we shifted, no ran away, from ur home town(shrinagar) ,where the voilence was at its peak, to jammu n then to delhi. n my father had 2 start everythin from zero, as we had left everythin behind hopin everythin will be alright in few years. i m really proud of my father... how he worked day n night so that we dont face any trouble. "daddy u r de best"

so, life went on with some happy n some sad memories. i was always too shy 2 talk 2 ppl, 2 make friends so my friend circle was limited. i always wanted 2 be all alone. oh n girls... they were alien 2 me... u will not believe me i was even shy takin 2 my sisters...ha. actually i never felt de need of a girl friend or a girlfriend... girls were too boooring n i always wanted 2 hav fun ;-)

although i had few crushes... but b4 i cud say somethin, which i think i never can, they already had changed 10 boyfriends, but it didnt make any difference 2 me... till... till i met de girl who changed me life

why???

so, why is this blog here? why today on 14th march 2006 i started this blog? umm... what happened 2day? i will again tell u later de ans 2 last question.
sometimes some things happen in ur life which have some effect on u. but some times the effect is not just a effect it is a memory it can be good or bad, it can be as bad as a deep cut. but as time is a great healer so i wanted something to keep the cut fresh.... so i choose 2 write this blog. i have had so many bad experience in my life that i no more can think positive.
in other words i started this blog due 2 a girl, a girl not like othre girls, a girl so beautiful that even folowers look so dull, a girl.... a girl who came 2 my life without my permission , a girl who taught me 2 love, but she was a girl. i dont know when where how why but i was in love with her n... in my next post i will u some flashback on my fucking life.

me, main, moi

silence is de way i talk.... n i guess i was wrong, maybe my this attitude towards life was wrong n has made me a looser. who i m... whatever my name is i will camm myself 'looser2010' why 2010 that i will tell u. what else u wanna know bout me... am i good looking... i dont think so, otherwise even after 19 years i wouldnt be without a girlfriend... i mean i want someone 2 love me... i want someone who will not leave me alone even for a second, though i think i now am used 2 it, i want someone for whome i will be the most imp. person. i know u r getting bored, u will i am not a writter... i started this blog cause... will tell u in de next post. if u r reading my blog it can mean 2 things 1) u r very special 2 me thats why i told u 2 read my blog or 2) u r a hardcore blog reader n r reading 2 kill time. Njoy
oh! n one more thing.... if u r wandring what a fool i m 2 call myself a looser... u will come come 2 know